Sunday, March 17, 2013

Divorce Money

I was thinking today about my friend, DDA. DDA and I worked together in Tulsa. One day she shared her story with me. DDA told me about her husband and his womanizing ways. That he had had several affairs and finally SHE left HIM.

DDA was LIVID. She set out to destroy her husband. She called his boss. She told friends, family, strangers, his co-workers horrible things about him. They were kinda sorta true but not really true. Basically, DDA would tell anyone she could about how mean her husband was to her. How HE abandoned her. About his affairs. How he used to beat her. What a terrible father he was. It's a wonder she was so angry - you'd think she would have been ecstatic to be rid of him.

DDA knew that she could hit him where it counted. In his wallet.

One day, DDA showed up at his job. She caused a SCENE. Her husband, GA, took her aside and told DDA this basically:

"I know you are hurt and angry. But I also know that you have not worked for most of our marriage and that you are going to need alimony. If I lose my job, there is not going to be any alimony for you. So I suggest you stop trying to make me out to be a bad guy and trying to hurt me financially."

DDA realized he was right. She stopped her smear campaign. She stopped trying to hurt him financially.

GA lived up to his side. He took care of her financially. They ended up going to counseling. They ended up staying married. That was about 20 years ago. They are still married. Heck, they went on to be one of the BEST marriage counselors at our old church.

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