Here are a few things we do to keep the love alive....
1. Hold hands in the car
We have managed to maintain this for almost 15 years. It's a way to connect that is just for us.
2. Kiss daily
We almost always kiss "Goodbye" when J drops me off at work or one of us leaves for the day and we kiss "Hello" when we see each other again in the evening. Usually just a peck. Sometimes the kids protest. But we tell them that it is far better to have a mom and dad that kids than a mom and dad that don't kiss each other.
3. Say "I love you"
We say it in the morning. We text it throughout the day. We say it randomly and we say it at night.
4. Top 3
Our family shares our Top 3 favorite things about our day at dinner. Focus on the positive!!!
Joke around. Tease each other. Find the humor in life. Sometimes if you don't laugh you are going to cry. Choose laughter.
J and I scare each other all the time. I am notorious for hiding on him. Play board games or exercise together. Have fun! Don't take yourself so serious.
7. Be real
Who you are at home is who you should be in public. You should be your authentic self wherever you go. But it's okay to burp or pass gas at home or in the car - just not in public.
It's so much easier to just tell the truth. If you don't like something, say it. If you messed up, say it.
9. Support interests
Take an interest in your partner's interests. It gives you more to talk about! I read J's trade magazines or help him set up the stage. He helps me with my volunteer and marketing projects.
10. Remember who you married
Kids, bills, jobs, family can all cloud the person that is our partner. Learn to separate the wife from the mother. You married the wife. Don't let all the noise get in the way of who you fell in love with.
11. Be polite
Say "please" and "thank you" to your spouse and kids. It's not just for strangers.
Just talk to each other. Say what's on your mind. Ask questions. Sometimes we assume stuff about our partner's motives and intentions that just aren't really the case. Talking and getting concerns or out in the open can make life easier for you both.
Jealousy can kill a relationship. They chose YOU! Give them credit for that and quit living in fear.
Have lots of it and often. It's great exercise and it's what single people think married people do all the time. Let them be right!
15. Touch Feet
Each night, J and I touch feet. It's our way of connecting without words or expectations. If we fought that day it's a way of apologizing and moving on.