First Day of School 2014

Michigan Ave with our 6th and 3rd graders!
August 2014

1st Day of School 2013-14

Mini Me = Grade 2
Motor Mouth = Grade 5

Mini Practice

Mini Me has been having a hard time staying seated during rug time and not being patient to raise her hand and wait for teacher response.

I should mention her school does NOT require the kids to sit perfectly in rows and rows of desks. They work at tables in a community environment and can stand or sit when completing desk work.

To help Mini Me, J taped a square on our living room rug. This is where Mini Me now does her homework. If she has a question during homework time, she has to raise her hand. Sometimes, she has to wait a minute or two if I'm working on a tough math concept with Motor Mouth.

Her teachers report that it's working in class!!!

Each day we get a good school behavior report, Mini Me gets a check mark. Ten check marks and I will teach her to either crochet or sew.

Don't Judge a Book

When you look at Mini Me, you see a spunky little girl with pink hair.

She looks confident and strong. 

Mini Me is strong because she has had to fight from the start. She looks tough because her little life has not been easy for her. As a newborn, Mini Me had to detox from drugs. As a baby, she had stomach issues. She was slow to walk and slow to talk.

Mini Me now has to do eye therapy. She has had to do speech therapy for years. And she has mild sensory issues. Nothing comes easy for that girl. 

While it breaks my heart to see Mini Me have to work so hard to do what comes naturally for most people, I also appreciate her struggle. Whatever Mini Me accomplishes is through hard work. I love that she is a determined hard worker. This will serve her well in life. But I wish she didn't have to work so hard all the time.

So, when you see my little girl all smiles and powerful, know that you are also looking at a little girl that struggles to be normal.

"Where there is no struggle, there is no strength."
- Oprah Winfrey

Glasses - Pt. 1

Mini Me had some minor difficulty in school this year. Fortunately for her teachers, for us, and for Mini Me, the girl is eloquent. 

Basically, the teachers would write words and letters on the whiteboard and the students were required to write them down. Her teachers found that Mini Me was taking longer than most students. They were concerned as Mini Me was doing well in all other areas. 

One day, Mini Me said, "The letters on the board look like they are having a play date." I have three dear friends who are optometrists. After talking to my friend, Dr. C., she suggested I talk to Dr. V, an acquaintance of mine. 

Dr. V. saw Mini Me and did a number of tests. She specializes in little kids.  Mini Me needs glasses to look at the whiteboard. And she needs to do eye therapy to strengthen her eyes. Basically, most people have the ability to adjust from seeing far and seeing up close but Mini Me needs a little bit of help to work on this. 

Mini Me needs glasses but...not these glasses!

All They Can Say Is "No"

The kids' school does very low key fundraisers. This is the second year they have done a flower fundraiser. It's real flowers - flats, pots, hanging baskets, for less than you can get them at Home Depot.

This year, I took the kids with me around our condo complex. They gave the order forms only the neighbors we know by name. About 14 neighbors. Of those, 4 neighbors placed orders. That's 4 more than their school would have had if they hadn't taken 15 minutes out of their evening playtime.

The kids had a blast! They got to visit their friends and walk around the building visiting their friends' dogs. And by friends, I mean adults. When the orders started coming in, the kids were ecstatic!

J thought I was insane but then when he saw the orders rolling in, he began to catch the excitement.

I think it is important to teach our children the importance of going outside their comfort level. To teach them that the worst someone can say is "no." To teach them the joy and excitement that comes from getting that "yes." To teach them to give back to their school. To teach them that they can make a difference. To teach them that they can leverage their sphere of influence to make a difference or to create change.

All those life lessons from a handing out an 8.5" x 11" color brochure with pretty pictures of flowers. 

Mini Me Poetry

Mini Me has to recite a poem in front of her class and the parents next month. She wanted it on doctors and vets b/c that is what she wants to be when she grows up - and a dentist. Hard to find appropriate poems she can read w/her speech issues. I was panicking - I couldn't find anything and her selection was due the next day. I emailed her teachers for an extension because I decided to write one for her - at 6:30 am today. I thought I would need the weekend.

Then I did it! This morning I wrote a poem for Mini Me to recite.
She approves! Enjoy. 

A doctor, a dentist, a vet too,
That's what I want to do.
When I grow up big I will,
I will care for the ill.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, 
I will care for the weak.
Thursday and Friday,
It's the teeth I will tweak.

Saturday and Sunday,
It's for animals I'll care.
Oh me, oh my,
There's no time for my hair!

- By Widney Woman




So I won't win a literary award but my kid loves it and the teachers approved it. Watching Mini Me perform it will be award enough.

The Littles

Do you remember reading "The Littles" when you were a kid? I LOVED the Little family. I used to wish we had tiny humans with mouse tails living in our walls.

In fact, one time, we had a 2"x2" hole in a wall by the baseboard and I told a friend that the Littles lived in the walls and used that hole to get in and out. In hindsight, she probably thought we had mice. No mice. Just my very vivid 10-year old imagination.

I'm always in search of book series' to grab my children's interests. (I got them hooked on Lemony Snickets "A Series of Unfortunate Events" and Motor Mouth hooked on "39 Clues.") Needless to say, I was extremely happy when the children jumped on board and got excited about me reading The Littles to them. Did you know that there is value in reading aloud to children right through middle school and beyond? Reading to your children should no stop once they can read to themselves.

I found the first Littles book in the series at a Barnes & Noble in town. I found 6 more in the series while hanging out in-store at www.Open-Books.org (great organization, check them out). I ordered two more from Scholastic through school. Now I'm on the hunt for the final 3 titles I'm missing.

We are an excited family!

First Day of School - 2011

School started about a month ago. 

J was in town to take first day of school photos. 

J took the kids under the El tracks just down from the school 

for an impromptu photo session.

He dropped the kids off at school. Then he was off to the airport.

This was the first day Mini Me was a student at Motor Mouth's school. 

She absolutely loves it!

The Kids Are Alright

Through a series of events, our children will be spending the summer in Tulsa. Here is a glimpse based on text messages to me from J's mom:

June 12
Mini Me started crying last night and said she wanted her mommy. We told her maybe we could find a bus in the morning and send her back. She wanted to know who would be with her. We said she could go by herself. She went into "Miss Instructor" mode, informing us that children can't travel by themselves. They have to have an adult. She still missed her mommy and her mommy sings lullabies to her. We sang "You are my sunshine" while Grandpa pulled on her legs. She was his sunshine. That made her giggle. Then we sang "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and with that her head rolled back and just like that she was out.

They did swim vigorously for about an hour and a half. Grandpa had to carry her upstairs. We had been singing and rocking in the rocking chair. The girls are still asleep. Boys have been up for awhile. Planning our day. It is rainy here. [Branson, MO]

[pic of Grandparents and 4 grandkids in a water ride at Sliver Dollar City]

American Plunge. First time. Second time Grandpa Fly Guy chicken out and videotaped us. Third water ride today. We are soaked!!!

June 13
Just got home and the van is completely unloaded. Kids are fine. They've all been running from room to room, getting reacquainted with the house.

June 15
Have been closed in with 5 little ones, watching "Night at the Museum."

[Later that night]
We've been at the farm. On our way home now. They've been on the trampoline, riding the 4-wheeler (slowly) and playing with the puppy and kitten. They are worn out.

June 17
Motor Mouth and I were talking about an hour ago about his reading and looking for his books. I'm sure they are here....Packing to go to the farm for the next 2 nights.

There are several bird nests here at the house and I taped a hand mirror to a broomstick so we could see in the nests. One was empty. On had an egg and one has 5 baby birds. Very little, eyes not open yet. Motor Mouth thought they were so cute and funny. We could hear their parents making angry noises.

Grandpa Grandpa gave Motor Mouth a fishing pole for his birthday. Grandpa and Jazz had bought some bait and went over to Grandpa Grandpa's pond. They caught several fish and when they moved an old boat to see if it worked, there was a water moccasin under it. Grandpa killed it. Motor Mouth thinks they are going to stay up and fish all night. He has his heart set on catching a great big catfish. That would make his summer for sure. I told him we needed to get him a summer journal so he could keep track of all he will have done. With spaces for drawings and pictures that we print.

Found 2 books. Diary of a Wimpy Kid. Star Wars Jedi Quest.

June 22
All kids are watching "Astro Boy." We have yours, 2 of Faith Chick's, and Cousin M.

Mini Me had a bloody nose last night. Really bloody and drippy. She and Grandpa were tossing her boot and it hit her nose. She's okay. I think Grandpa was pretty shook up.

June 25
We are on the way home from Cousin K's [cattle farm in western Oklahoma].

Kids all fished at Cousin K's friends' pond. Cousin M caught 4 perch. The pond is overstocked with them so he catches and throws them away up on the bank. Mini Me sees this. Hikes up the bank. Brings it back to the edge and chunks it in. Then she had to wash her hands in the water.

A little bit later, she brought a grasshopper to Cousin K. She told him "I caught it all by myself." Little pause. "And I squashed it all by myself!" I thought Cousin K and I were going to fall off our bench - after she walked away!

The kids are alright.

Tough Questions Kids Ask

What is with our kids asking ALL the tough questions this month????? 

 Tonight, Motor Mouth asked if Santa is real. 

They asked what sex was. 

We told them the truth. 

They asked what gay was. 

We told them the truth.

They asked how to get pregnant. 

We told them the truth.

They asked how the doc can tell if it is a boy or girl.

We told them the truth.

They asked why they don't live with their birth moms.

We told them the truth.

They asked if Santa is real. 

"Yes, Santa is real!!!"

It's NOT The Stork!

J and I had "The Talk" with our kids on Saturday. My plan was to wait until June when school lets out. However, Mini Me just had far too many questions that were being answered one at a time. It was obvious she was ready. It is important to us to be the "sex experts" in our kids' lives. We want to be the resource they go to for answers. We want to be foremost authority - not some kid in their school.

A few weeks ago I asked our local librarian for books to help with the talk. She gave me "It's NOT the Stork!" by Robie H. Harris. To be honest, the book sat on the floor of my bedroom, unopened and unread by me. But when I found myself answering yet another sex question on Saturday morning, I knew I had to crack the book open.

This book is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!! Beyond awesome!!!

If you look back a blog entry or two, you will find my growing list of sex talk topics I was going to have to cover. Robie Harris covered ALL of these. Quite well. Thank you Robie!!! 

It was a major relief to be able to have one comprehensive, well-written, age and language appropriate resource. I thought it was going to be weeks of dinner conversations to cover all the topics. Nope. Just a 20-minute book read as a family on our master bed. There were only 3-4 pages I didn't want to go on into for my kids at this time. I paper clipped them so it was easier to skip. 

Afterwards, Mini Me had several follow up questions. Motor Mouth's question was "Can I go play Star Wars now?"

Tough Questions

Mini Me was mad at J about something this morning on the way to school. She told J that she would "just go live with (her) birth mom."

Mini Me wanted to know why she does not live with her birth mom and why her sisters live with TT. J explained that TT's daughters do not live with her. That wasn't enough. Our girl had to know why. J explained that TT can't take care of kids. J was honest and told her TT made some bad choices, did the bad kind of drugs, couldn't take care of her girls, and that she had been to jail. She seemed satisfied with the answers.

I've asked TT to talk to Mini Me directly and answer those questions personally this weekend. Gotta love open adoption!

How Do You Get Pregnant?

J and I were in the kitchen while J was prepping for dinner. J had just asked me to cut the veggies when Mini Me cut in to our conversation to ask: "How do you get pregnant?" Fortunately me for me, we have this little rule where the children must ask to interrupt J and I or adults talking. I ignored her and said I was going to go wash my hands in my bathroom. 

What the Hell???? Mini Me seems obsessed with sex these days. (Read my blogs over the last month or so). 

First she is telling me the definition of sex (when a mommy and daddy kiss laying down in their bedroom). Then she is telling me my drink (POM Wonderful) looks like "love potion." 

Next she tells us Motor Mouth Googled "sex." 

Last week Mini Me told me the definition of gay (when two girls get married. Like when your Barbies kiss. Or two boys get married). I did not tell you she said she would like to have two girls when she grows up - and she did not mean two daughters!  

The other day, Motor Mouth asked what "S&M" means (Rihanna's song was on the radio). J told him "snacks & meals" which Motor Mouth was happy to learn of. I froze. I had no answer. Of course, I was busy singing along that "whips and chains excite me" when he asked...

This week, Mini Me told me her and a boy in her class (a really cute one) decided they would get married but he broke his promise and decided to marry another boy so they could be gay (it's always the cute ones...) to which I told her even the best of us ladies have that happen to us. 

Also this week, Motor Mouth asked how the doctor can tell if it is a girl or boy when the baby is born. ("If it is a boy it has a penis. If it is a girl it has a vagina," I said. To which he said, "Oh yeah, that's right! I forgot. That's ALL I want to know, Mom.") 

This is punishment. I know it is. I am being punished for everything I put my parents through and then some. Granted, I wanted to be a stripper when I was six years old, but I have siblings who are seven or eight years older than me. Mini Me is leaps and bounds beyond her eight year old brother in questions she is asking. Why couldn't I have had two boys? Three even. I used to want three boys. Sigh.

So, I washed my hands. For as long as humanly possible. I stalled by Facebooking and tweeting. Finally, I went back into the kitchen. While chopping an onion, I looked at Mini Me and, in my most casual voice, said "You get pregnant when you have sex. Any other questions?" Mercifully, she went back to pretending to be able to read a book.

I was planning on giving the kids "The Talk" in June so that we could be the experts they receive their sex information from first. June so that they would not go to school and tell their unsuspecting and innocent friends (though I'm not so sure any of Mini Me's school friends are so innocent anymore). My list of discussion topics grows.

Ever Growing List of Topics for "The Talk"

- kissing

- marriage

- sex (intercourse)

- Internet porn (as in, don't Google, you might see more than you are ready for)

- homosexuality

- pregnancy

- child birth

- infertility (sometimes mommies or daddies are broken - lots of adoption q's these days)

- touching (bad touch has been discussed but will be reviewed)

- I think I can skip S&M for now but thanks, Rihanna!

- not telling other kids because their parents want to tell their kids when they are ready so keep this to yourselves!!

Clearly, this is a series of conversations that could take all summer. I'm seriously thinking about shipping the kids to grandma and grandpa after school ends so we can delay this...

If you have some good book out there, website, advice on how to do this, funny/crazy/horror/good stories on how you shared this info or received it, or just want to tell me this to shall end, please comment. Rather, HELP!!!

Gay Marriage

Mini Me told us a sad little story from her class. Mini Me is five years old.

Mini Me: "Boy A in my class said he and I are going to get married when we grow up. But then Boy A broke his promise and change his mind. Boy A and Boy B say they gonna get married. They want to be gay."

Me: "Sorry, Baby, that happens to the best of us sometimes."

S.E.X. For Kids

A little over a month ago, Mini Me and Motor Mouth told me they know what s.e.x. is. They were pretty aligned that it is when a mommy and daddy kiss laying down in their bedroom. 

About a month ago, Mini Me found this in the fridge and asked if it was "love potion."

Then about a week ago, Mini Me told us that Motor Mouth had Googled s.e.x. Unfortunately, J had taken the parental controls off their computer so they were free to view p.o.r.n. J locked down the computer uber tight once again. 

I googled s.e.x. If they did an image search, we are okay. It backs up the aforementioned definition. HOWEVER, if they clicked on either of the two video links on a regular search, we are in TROUBLE!

Yesterday, Motor Mouth asked me how the doctor can tell if the baby is a boy or girl when it comes out. I said, "If it's a boy, it has a penis. If it is a girl, it has a vagina." Motor Mouth said, "Oh, yeah, that's right. Okay, Mom, that's ALL I want to know."

Today, J did a detailed search of the browsing history on their computer. It seems auto correct can be a beautiful thing. They did a Bing search on s.e.x. and came back with "s.e.x. offenders" and "s.e.x. during pregnancy." Hahaha! Whew! We dodged a bullet on that one. 

Gay Birds and Bees

Last night we went for a walk through the grounds of Buckingham Fountain. Lovely walk. On the way to the car, out-of-the-blue, Mini Me says, "I know what 'gay' means." To which I said, "Really? What does 'gay' mean?"

"Gay is when a girl marries a girl," said Mini Me.

Pretty spot on for a FIVE-year old!!!

Mini Me went on to say that "gay" is when your Barbie dolls kiss and when a boy marries a boy.

Motor Mouth seems to be a bit of a homophobe. He was appalled at the definition of "gay."

We explained to the children that some people are born gay and that it is normal. That we love and respect gay people. We shared the names of people we, as a family, love that are gay. It helped the children to see that it doesn't matter if someone is gay - we love them.

I was thinking we would have the heterosexual birds and bees conversation in June, after school lets out. Now, that conversation for our 5 and 8 year olds will be more encompassing and a bit more detailed than I had initially thought.

Homework

Mini Me came home telling me she had homework. I did not help her with it. My four-year old does not need homework.

My kids are in school about seven hours a day. If their teachers can't get it together and teach them what they need in that length of time, they should be fired. Think about it. When you are at work all day long, do you want to bring home an hour or more of work? My kids are...children. They need to be children. The job of a child is to play. Children learn through play.

Here is something else to think about. If your child starts doing an hour or two of homework every night in second grade, where do they go from there? When does it end? When does your child get to love school and love learning?

If in elementary school your child busts their butts with homework, are up until 1:00 am in high school doing homework, with more of the same in college, by the time your kid hits the work world, he/she is burned out! And they missed their childhood.

I love the way the kindergarten teacher at Mini Me's school next year does homework. First, reading 20 minutes/day to your child is the most important "homework".  A homework sheet is sent home about once every 3-4 weeks. On it, there are about 18-20 items, of which the students are asked to do about 15-18 of those in a 3-4 week period. Things like: "Count to 100 by 10's", "Count how many socks are in your sock drawer",  "Draw a picture of the third building past your home".

These are practical activities the children can do on their own without the help of a parent. Activities that take into account what they are learning in class. They do not take an hour. I don't think parents should have to do their kids' homework. We already did this stuff.

I am at peace

Today is the deadline for applying to Chicago Public Schools (CPS). I have received e-mails and verbal confirmation saying that due to recent changes in CPS policy, Motor Mouth would gain entry into Mini Me's magnet school next fall. That this time, he really will get in.

Mini Me attends a public Montessori school that is EXCELLENT. Montessori schools of this caliber typically run $15-20K/year. I am extremely pleased with her school. It is one of the best public schools in Chicago and it is one of the best public schools in the country. Plus, it is tuition FREE.

That said, I want both kids to attend Motor Mouth's private school. It's that good. Not free. In fact, the kids' combined tuition is more than many people's vehicles (per year). I'm not being an elitist who wants her kids at a private school at all cost. If both kids were in public school, I could be a full-time stay @home mom and we could live closer to their school and J's work in a great neighborhood. And I could write more blog posts.

We are making lifestyle choices to ensure our children are in a learning environment that we believe will strengthen their character, sense of self, and sense of community and provide them with a true Christian worldview where they learn about other faiths. When I look at the 8th grade graduates from Motor Mouth's school, I see the kind of character development I want to see in my children.

Motor Mouth's k-8 curriculum is outstanding but where I make the differentiation between the two schools is in middle school. I believe that the resources, experiences, materials and methods used at Motor Mouth's school will better prepare our children to excel at a high school and at a college level.

So now, on the deadline to apply to Mini Me's school for Motor Mouth to get in, I am at peace. I know we have chosen the best educational option for our children. I know that whatever happens, we will make sure our kids get to be educated at Motor Mouth's school through 8th grade. And, I don't feel like I have to apply to Mini Me's school 'just in case'. I am at peace.

Should Kids Have iPads?

I think so. There are a lot of educational applications (apps) you can download for children. 

Motor Mouth waiting for me while out 

Our kindergarten teachers use an iPad in their classroom. Later in the school year, the children will use the iPad for sending e-mails to their parents during the day (kindergarten has a letter writing curriculum component and emails are a modern version of letter writing). But at this point, they use the iPad for things likes practicing letter shapes by tracing the letters on the iPad's touch screen. 

See this drawing below here? Motor Mouth figured out how to draw on the iPad without anyone showing him how. Wait, let me rephrase this. We did not know you could draw on the iPad without downloading an app. Not only is the kid creative and talented, but he is resourceful as well.

Super Mario masterpiece.

Motor Mouth created this by drawing on the iPad with his finger.

Not convinced my 7-yr old did a good job drawing Mario? 

Here is my kid in his Super Mario costume.